Ask A White Girl: Substance Abuse Help

@CandiBrandyWine is a full-time, professional advice columnist. You may contact her by email with your question, or you may follow her on Twitter and on Instagram.

Dear Candi, I am having a seriously hard time kicking hard drugs. I know that your column rarely deals with addiction, but I’m reaching out as a last resort here. No one will answer my calls or emails and I really appreciate that you take the time to give such amazing advice. Can you help me with my hard drug problem, before I lose everything?

First of all, I’m not even going to act like I haven’t been there. I mean, those things are hard to avoid. In high school, I was deep in that scene. One night, I raided Mom and Dad’s liquor cabinet with the guy I had a super huge crush on, and that’s where it all began. I will NEVER look at Bacardi Gold the same, EVER again.

Next it was pot. I remember how concerned my mom wasb when she caught on to my week-long bad habit of smuggling apples to smoke out of in the back yard. You guys, I was so tacky and drugged-out that someone talked me into EATING the apple when I was done. WTF. The munchies told me to do it!! I know...I’m disgusted with myself, too.

Admittedly, getting off of drugs and alcohol is hard; BUT I HAVE A SUPER HELPFUL TIP TO GET YOU THERE!!! (Loopholes are our BFFs, babes). You’ve just got to replace your addiction with something legal and healthy...

For instance, Amy’s step-dad is a pharmacist and totes taught me the wonders of Vicodin. Okay...I know how that sounds, but, it’s AMY’S DAD, friends. He is super nice and normal and only wants what’s best for me. For just $3 a pill, you can pop one of these supplements when you need a second, and you will be "high," ready to function and you can absolutely still go to work on it!!! I even drive with it in my system and there’s legit never been an issue. I hope that helps, babes! Here’s a toast to your recovery. XOXO ♡

@CandiBrandywine

If you’re brave, follow @CandiBrandyWine on Twitter and Instagram.

(More July / August 2019 Articles & Content)